Gay Bingo

Gay Bingo

Gay Bingo
by Tessa Batacharia

Gay Bingo is the latest craze storming the country. With more glam and a few more tiaras than your average blue rinse Bingo, Gay Bingo isn't about winning a bottle of gin, it's about getting drunk, flirting outrageously, and not behaving like your Granny.

We caught up with Satanica Pandamonia (pictured), Gay Bingo caller at the T Bar, Tea Building London, to find out a little bit more about this new craze.

What's your real name?
Jonny Woo

How long have you been a Gay Bingo "ball caller"?
In reality for only 18 months, although it has always been a life long dream.

What's the difference between Gay Bingo and just Bingo?
There are probably more poofs in the straight Bingo halls than Mecca would like to admit. The straight games tend to be more fiercely fought, the fags at Gay Bingo are more keen to see what I can do with a pair of numbered balls. And I think the crowd is generally cuter.

What is Hyper-Speed Bingo? ( from Jonny's 'Gay Bingo from Outer Space' night)
Ever gone 1-90 in 30 seconds? No, well hold tight and scream if you want to go faster. The winner gets shed loads of tequila. That's if they haven't already thrown up.

What is zero gravity dauber action? ( from Jonny's 'Gay Bingo from Outer Space' night)
The skill in Bingo especially when played in Outer Space is all in the wrist action of the hand carrying the dauber ... your pen ... to cover the number cards at the required speed, especially in Hyper Speed Bingo, a lightness and deftness of touch is required, the dauber resting on the numbers for less than a micro second. The effect is that of weightlessness in the dauber carrying hand.

Why run Gay Bingo @ Tea Building?
Ma Butcher from Laundry Communications thought it would be good to get the fags out the backrooms and back into the Bingo halls ... from then on it's up to me.

What are the rules?
Do as I say. Fuck up and you're out ... of the closet that is. Eyes down at all times (I wear fabulous couture to try and distract the merry Bingo players). Lines go across the playing cards not up your nose and if you get a full house flog the prize porn and move in next door....

What's on the prize list?
Porn. Booze. Celebrity bits and bobs, nude house cleaning .... and me.

Is it possible to cheat?
No. Well not for any fee less than at least ???1000. Cash only.

Why do people relate Bingo to old biddies, what are you doing to change that?
People of a certain age - let's not get ageist here - may have a little more time on their hands and are able to train more extensively in the beautiful game of Bingo. I encourage those still caught in the rat race of life to make time to train for the quieter years and get a head start, so when Bingo becomes a way of life they are guaranteed to win, win and win again.

Does it ever get catty?
Once a foul call related in a player's head being chopped off ... next question.

How much is a session?
It's free. Although I believe we have some punters who charge at least ???100 per hour but that's a different story!

Gay Bingo hosted by Satanica Pandamonia @ The Tea Building, monthly on a Sunday from 5pm.

Tea Building
56 Shoreditch High Street
London E1
tel: 020 7240 9559 / 020 7729 2973

Sponsored by:
www.partypoker.com

Back to high rollers homepage